Chivalry

Is it dying or being murdered?

A Gentleman. We say this word frequently and hear it every where. “Ladies and Gentlemen, allow me to...” and all that. The word is defined as a man who is “chivalrous”, “courteous”, or “honorable”. Its an old fashioned statement and an old fashioned way of existence now. They say chivalry is dying in the world. But there are still strong instances where a man will still open the door for a lady, stand up when someone shakes their hand or give the tired looking old lady a seat on the bus.

Sadly, it is becoming very rare in our beautiful country. We Sri Lankans are known to have taken all the wrong things from our British colonial rulers from the time we were a dominion. We took all the snobbery, all the elitist classism and use the capability of speaking that wonderful language, English, as a weapon . People do not remember the courtesy and politeness that also came with that culture. Our culture is very rich, mostly because its fed by so many ethnicities. But we stubbornly stick to all the bad traditions and let go of the good that is part of it.

Pips was in the bus the other day. She called me and when she told me she was standing (she was carrying several heavy bags) I asked jokingly if there weren't any gentlemen around willing to give her a seat. What she said was that while there were several members of the fair sex standing, some of them old ladies with their weekly shopping in massive bags, The seats were occupied mostly by young men. Our buses have seats that are specifically reserved for the disabled, pregnant and the clergy. But I myself have seen many “manly”, bearded, testosterone filled meat bags sitting very comfortably on seats with “Reserved for Pregnant Women” hanging over them.

The reason for this “death” in chivalry is the elitist mentality of people. The “posh” individuals, as we derisively call them in Sri Lanka, are those who have quasi British accents and look down on the “common” folk. They spend there time going to expensive cafes and boutiques and talk about their neighbor's daughter running off with a low caste man or some such nonsense. The surprising thing is that the so called “normal” people who are not snobbish are even worse. The well-to-do are, unfairly to those who are polite and downright good people, always seen as the snobs and made fun of. When we have such petty issues how is it possible to create Gentlemen who are, courteous and polite? Especially when we see gentlemanliness as a big headed “foreign” ideal.

Now what I wanted to ask you guys is this: Since these issues are known and people may be doing something about it, its actually old news. However in today's world does chivalry have a place? We are all for equality and treating people in the same way. So, would it be sexist to hold the door for a woman? Simply because she is a woman? If so should chivalry be allowed not to slowly die, but, be exterminated completely and without pity? Such mysteries…

Should I keep opening doors for the girls?

-Wips